From the moment we started the Green Pages process, we knew a deployment was in our future. There was no escaping that ugly monster, it comes with the territory.
Although now-a-days most deployments, ugh I shutter whenever I hear, say or type that word I feel like I am cursing, are shorter (9 months instead of a year plus) I feel deployments start as soon as the word comes into you life.
We knew we had to go to a place that was deploying ASAP so Fort Hood, Texas it was. Chris had to report 10 January and we knew he would leave shortly after we arrived but we didn't know the exact date. We were under the impression that his new battalion was deploying in February. Wrong! They were already gone and had been down range for a few months, both a blessing and curse. It was a blessing because that meant Chris would be joining them for the remainder of the deployment and I count my lucky stars that translated into less than five months. Not knowing when he would actually be leaving was the curse because we had just bought a house, were in the process of unpacking and we had just gotten to a place that neither of us has ever been before.
Chris had to do his in processing to the new post and to his new battalion before we would know more about when he would be leaving. Usually, when an entire battalion deploys the entire group travels to NTC for a month for training, families get pre deployment briefs (what to expect, establish the FRG, get emergency contact info, create CARE Teams, get a phone list), you and your spouse have time to get the correct paper work in order (THE hardest part for me, hands down. I mean c'mon what other couples do you know of that have to have a living will, make sure the life insurance policy is squared away, discuss a "What if" scenario pertaining to IF they don't come home (where they would like to be laid to rest, cremation, ect, or something happens to them and you need to leave the country (so making sure your passport is up-to-date), going over how to pay the bills, squaring away finances and ect.
None of that happened for us. As soon as he in processed, he was off getting various vaccinations, collecting his gear, packing his gear and bypassed all the predeployment training. That made my head spin. I mean they have this training in place for a reason right? Now I feel like he is ill prepared and he's going to a unit where he knows no one, so who will have his back!?
We did get the house set up and unpacked, we did get our paperwork together, including tax stuff but in terms of the pre deployment brief and FRG support, I got nada, zilch. He's been gone over a month and I haven't gotten one phone call from the BN commander's wife, FRG leader, FRSA, no e-mails, no coffee invitations, no olive branches. Big. Fat. Goose Egg!
Maybe I am spoiled from having such an amazing support system in Hawaii, but this is Fort Hood Texas. This is the biggest post in the Army and they deploy units like its nothing. This should be a routine, right?
The one part I like about the Army is the sense of family and community and the coming together when spouses are gone. That's what makes being a spouse manageable. Being surrounded by like minded people going through the same thing as you to pow wow with. I don't have that. I don't have any unit support and my ass is chaffed about it. Really puts a sour taste in my mouth.
So what did I do about it? About a week into the deployment I emailed the FRG contact I had been given. After not hearing back in over a week, I called up the Rear Detachment Commander and he told me that person had stepped down and he just appointed a new person (the least she could have done was respond to my email saying she was no longer the leader for crying out loud) and he gave me her number. So I called her and of course I got her at a bad time, story of my life, but she indulged me and admitted she had no idea what she was doing but she was going to meet with the Rear D Commander on Monday and she would call me/email me when she wrapped her around it and let me know how I could help her out.
It's been three weeks and I have heard nothing. At this point I'm over it and i'm lucky that I have a friend from FLW that only lives a few miles away, and two familiar faces from Hawaii locally as well.
I consider myself to be a pretty strong and independent person. I also knew what I was getting myself into when I married someone with the sense of service to their country. I've got my big girl panties on and I am facing this monster head on and have lots of things planned to get me through this.
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Hope
I was in an awful head space during our PCS move. I had just undergone the final test in our infertility work up, the HSG, and got the news that we couldn't have a baby naturally. We would need medical intervention.
Once I got into the TRICARE system here at Fort Hood, my new PCM gave me the referral to see a specialist to find out out next steps. Usually I go to these appointments solo, but this time Chris and I were being seen together. How novel, an apt to see both of together seeing as how it takes two...
Well let me tell you, I was both elated and angry all at the same time. I learned more in the first 5 minutes from our new dr than I got from being in MO for 6 months!
Here is what went down:
I already knew I wasn't ovulating and all we knew about Chris's sperm count is that the number of his viable sperm were low and slow. What we didn't know is that he has lots of sperm or why his count was low. When I asked the quack in MO if anything causes this he said "nah, this isn't a fluke, it is what it is, nothing affects them."
Well, apparently if a man is taking supplements, herbals, protein, vitamins and or anything from GNC at the time of the test those things can affect the sample. As does a diet high in caffeine and salt.
I was floored! Chris was taking vitamin supplements and protein from GNC!
Why didn't the doc ask Chris if he was taking any of those things before he made his deposit? I mean every time I have anything done the doctors ask what meds I am taking, if I am taking anything OTC and instructions like don't take x, y or z before this test and no eating after midnight and ect.
If the doctor asked him Chris would have said yes, and we would have rescheduled the test. Why didn't the doc offer the above as a possible reason behind the results?!
Now we have hope!
My new dr gave me a 5 months supply of the Progesterone all at once (this is a Godsend in and of itself! In MO I had to wait until day 38 of not getting a period, call and leave a message for the nurse/dr, wait for them to call me back to order a pregnancy test, go in and take the test, wait for the dr to read the results, wait for him to call in the Rx, go pick up the Rx and then take the pills, wait to start bleeding, and then repeat all over again) which saves so much time!
It's not healthy to not have a bleed every 5 months, because it can cause the lining to build up which leads to cervical cancer, pelvic inflammatory diseases and implementation issues, just to name a few things. Now, if I don't get a period every 5 weeks I just need to take the pills. I don't need to take a pregnancy test every 5 weeks because Chris is deployed. Once he gets home, I will have to go to the dr's office to take a test before taking the medication.
The dr gave us both homework during the deployment. I need to get my BMI down to 24-26, eat more fruits, veggies, drink lots of water and work out like a mad woman. Bringing my BMI down can jump start ovulation and all that coupled with the Progesterone can also jump start it. If I do all the above and i'm still not ovulating, which happens to a lot of women, I can take Clomid.
Chris has to also lose weight, eat more fruits and veggies and has to go cold turkey on caffeine. Hopefully his sperm will be super charged and we can be a deployment statistic =)
If we don't have luck naturally she shed some light on what our other options are. She said there is a clinic in Austin where we could have the IUI done for $800 and that the clinic in San Antonio could do the IVF for between $5-$8,000.
Our new dr feels really confident that we can have a baby naturally and that we will be pregnant before the end of the year!
Fingers crossed!
Once I got into the TRICARE system here at Fort Hood, my new PCM gave me the referral to see a specialist to find out out next steps. Usually I go to these appointments solo, but this time Chris and I were being seen together. How novel, an apt to see both of together seeing as how it takes two...
Well let me tell you, I was both elated and angry all at the same time. I learned more in the first 5 minutes from our new dr than I got from being in MO for 6 months!
Here is what went down:
I already knew I wasn't ovulating and all we knew about Chris's sperm count is that the number of his viable sperm were low and slow. What we didn't know is that he has lots of sperm or why his count was low. When I asked the quack in MO if anything causes this he said "nah, this isn't a fluke, it is what it is, nothing affects them."
Well, apparently if a man is taking supplements, herbals, protein, vitamins and or anything from GNC at the time of the test those things can affect the sample. As does a diet high in caffeine and salt.
I was floored! Chris was taking vitamin supplements and protein from GNC!
Why didn't the doc ask Chris if he was taking any of those things before he made his deposit? I mean every time I have anything done the doctors ask what meds I am taking, if I am taking anything OTC and instructions like don't take x, y or z before this test and no eating after midnight and ect.
If the doctor asked him Chris would have said yes, and we would have rescheduled the test. Why didn't the doc offer the above as a possible reason behind the results?!
Now we have hope!
My new dr gave me a 5 months supply of the Progesterone all at once (this is a Godsend in and of itself! In MO I had to wait until day 38 of not getting a period, call and leave a message for the nurse/dr, wait for them to call me back to order a pregnancy test, go in and take the test, wait for the dr to read the results, wait for him to call in the Rx, go pick up the Rx and then take the pills, wait to start bleeding, and then repeat all over again) which saves so much time!
It's not healthy to not have a bleed every 5 months, because it can cause the lining to build up which leads to cervical cancer, pelvic inflammatory diseases and implementation issues, just to name a few things. Now, if I don't get a period every 5 weeks I just need to take the pills. I don't need to take a pregnancy test every 5 weeks because Chris is deployed. Once he gets home, I will have to go to the dr's office to take a test before taking the medication.
The dr gave us both homework during the deployment. I need to get my BMI down to 24-26, eat more fruits, veggies, drink lots of water and work out like a mad woman. Bringing my BMI down can jump start ovulation and all that coupled with the Progesterone can also jump start it. If I do all the above and i'm still not ovulating, which happens to a lot of women, I can take Clomid.
Chris has to also lose weight, eat more fruits and veggies and has to go cold turkey on caffeine. Hopefully his sperm will be super charged and we can be a deployment statistic =)
If we don't have luck naturally she shed some light on what our other options are. She said there is a clinic in Austin where we could have the IUI done for $800 and that the clinic in San Antonio could do the IVF for between $5-$8,000.
Our new dr feels really confident that we can have a baby naturally and that we will be pregnant before the end of the year!
Fingers crossed!
MIA
Where in the world and what in the world have the Lynch's been up to?
Allow me to break it down:
We PCS'ed from FLW to Fort Hood, Texas (That's right we moved 2x in a year!)
Spent Christmas and New Years Eve in the Happiest Place on Earth, WDW
Signed the closing docs for our first home while on vaca in WDW
Ate our way through WDW to the tune of 7 lbs gained EACH
Chris turned 28
Drove cross country, first from MO to CT then CT to TX in TWO SEPARATE cars and with TWO dogs
Currently in the process of making our house into a home
Chris Deployed Jan 18=(
I ran my first 1/2 marathon Jan 24 (Princess 1/2 in Walt Disney World, yupp i love that place)
Did my first Epcot Crawl aka drinking around the world
Just got home from the most epic girls weekend everrrr
Allow me to break it down:
We PCS'ed from FLW to Fort Hood, Texas (That's right we moved 2x in a year!)
Spent Christmas and New Years Eve in the Happiest Place on Earth, WDW
Signed the closing docs for our first home while on vaca in WDW
Ate our way through WDW to the tune of 7 lbs gained EACH
Chris turned 28
Drove cross country, first from MO to CT then CT to TX in TWO SEPARATE cars and with TWO dogs
Currently in the process of making our house into a home
Chris Deployed Jan 18=(
I ran my first 1/2 marathon Jan 24 (Princess 1/2 in Walt Disney World, yupp i love that place)
Did my first Epcot Crawl aka drinking around the world
Just got home from the most epic girls weekend everrrr
Friday, December 7, 2012
Results
My doctor didn't sugar coat it so neither will I.
We cannot have a baby without medical intervention.
Saying it, then typing it and then reading those words makes me weep.
Test Results:
Blood work:My hormone levels are fine and my parts look good. The problem with me is I'm not ovulating and they don't know why. If you don't ovulate, you don't release an egg, hence you can't concieve.
Semenalysis:Chris's sperm are slow and low. A normal percentage is 25% and he's at 8%. Me not ovulating coupled with his low, slow sperm count is "troubling."
We are both essentially broken.
So my options are pretty slim right now and I have to wait until we get to Fort Hood, Texas in January for me to even begin to explore my limited options, if they even have an infertility specialist. If they don't I may have to drive to San Antonio to see someone. I will make that trip.
My FLW OBGYN recommended for me to go on Clomid. Clomid stimulates the release of hormones necessary for ovulation to occur and it's mainly used for treating female infertility.
If I take Clomid to help me ovulate and after three rounds if that doesn't work on it's own, i'd have to take Clomid and have the doctors inject his sperm into my cervix, aka IUI.
If that doesn't work, remember Chris has a low and slow sperm count, our only option for children is the painful and expensice IVF treatments.
Did I mention IUI and IVF are all out of pocket and they are not cheap?
Atleast we are still young right?
TRICARE does not cover non-coital reproductive technologies such as artificial insemination, in-vitro fertilization or other types of assisted reproductive technology (ART) except under special circumstances for some severely wounded warriors.
Some Military Treatment Facilities may offer assisted reproductive technology services as part of their graduate medical education training programs.
From the get go, adoption for the both of us has been off the table and I am against using a surrogate. I want to experience all of it or none of it. Chris and I are also in agreement about not putting ourselves into debt over procedures that are not guarenteed (the average IVF cost is $12,000, but it can be as much as $15,000 per round).
I'm just numb. All I have ever wanted was to get married and have a family and I can't. We can't, naturally which is so defeating.
To make matters worse, Chris is deploying as soon as we get to Hood, which means we can't even start Clomid until he comes home in July/August. The doctor said perhaps weight loss will jump start my ovulation but that's still a long shot.
I went into this testing wanting answers, and I got them. Now I have to deal with the consequeces of opening Pandora's box.
I don't know who out there in cyber space reads my ramblings, but if you are a mom or dad, hung your kids for me. They are precious miracles. If you are the praying kind, pray for us.
We cannot have a baby without medical intervention.
Saying it, then typing it and then reading those words makes me weep.
Test Results:
Blood work:My hormone levels are fine and my parts look good. The problem with me is I'm not ovulating and they don't know why. If you don't ovulate, you don't release an egg, hence you can't concieve.
Semenalysis:Chris's sperm are slow and low. A normal percentage is 25% and he's at 8%. Me not ovulating coupled with his low, slow sperm count is "troubling."
We are both essentially broken.
So my options are pretty slim right now and I have to wait until we get to Fort Hood, Texas in January for me to even begin to explore my limited options, if they even have an infertility specialist. If they don't I may have to drive to San Antonio to see someone. I will make that trip.
My FLW OBGYN recommended for me to go on Clomid. Clomid stimulates the release of hormones necessary for ovulation to occur and it's mainly used for treating female infertility.
If I take Clomid to help me ovulate and after three rounds if that doesn't work on it's own, i'd have to take Clomid and have the doctors inject his sperm into my cervix, aka IUI.
If that doesn't work, remember Chris has a low and slow sperm count, our only option for children is the painful and expensice IVF treatments.
Did I mention IUI and IVF are all out of pocket and they are not cheap?
Atleast we are still young right?
TRICARE does not cover non-coital reproductive technologies such as artificial insemination, in-vitro fertilization or other types of assisted reproductive technology (ART) except under special circumstances for some severely wounded warriors.
Some Military Treatment Facilities may offer assisted reproductive technology services as part of their graduate medical education training programs.
From the get go, adoption for the both of us has been off the table and I am against using a surrogate. I want to experience all of it or none of it. Chris and I are also in agreement about not putting ourselves into debt over procedures that are not guarenteed (the average IVF cost is $12,000, but it can be as much as $15,000 per round).
I'm just numb. All I have ever wanted was to get married and have a family and I can't. We can't, naturally which is so defeating.
To make matters worse, Chris is deploying as soon as we get to Hood, which means we can't even start Clomid until he comes home in July/August. The doctor said perhaps weight loss will jump start my ovulation but that's still a long shot.
I went into this testing wanting answers, and I got them. Now I have to deal with the consequeces of opening Pandora's box.
I don't know who out there in cyber space reads my ramblings, but if you are a mom or dad, hung your kids for me. They are precious miracles. If you are the praying kind, pray for us.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Our First Home
I still can't wrap my head around the fact that we are home buyers!
So far everything is going well. We passed the credit portion (they look over all of your financial records to determine how responsible you are) and the appraisal (A lender won't lend you money if the home is valued less than the offer price) and our loan is at the final stage of underwriting.
All we need now is for the title work to come through. We've purchase our home owner's insurance and scheduled all of our utilities to be turned on and, just to be safe, ordered a home inspection.
Fingers crossed we can close on Dec. 26. Did I mention we will be signing of docs while we are in WDW?! What a place to create such an awesome memory =)
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